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Three Home Births

I have had three home births, each very different, each attended by a lay midwife.

Caleb was born 9-15-90 on a cool rainy evening. I had seen an OB along with my illegal lay midwife and decided I was just a number to the big group practice and I just wouldn't show up for the birth.

It was a textbook labor, with my water breaking about 5 a.m. I went about my routine and contractions started getting stronger in the early afternoon. I lost track of time after the midwives arrived. I remember wanting to "leave" and get away from it all, spent lots of time pacing. I squatted on the floor next to my bed and Caleb was born after 45 min of pushing. He was very quiet and had big eyes. He was our biggest baby at 7 lbs, 8 oz.

The second labor was even better. Lydia was born Jan 2 1993. I wasn't convinced I was really in labor. I fixed dinner and washed up the dishes. I remember draping myself over a footstool while Dr Quinn Medicine Woman was on tv. The midwife arrived at the same time the grandparents came to pick up our toddler. My water broke suddenly when I sat down in a rocking chair. Contractions got really heavy at that point. Lydia was born on a birthing stool after only one push. she came out howling and I felt wonderful!.She was born at 10:30 p.m.

The third birth I can only describe as strange. Prior to the pregnancy I had read "Having Twins" by Elizabeth Noble and I really wanted to conciously conceive twins. At the time I was due, I thought I was having contractions when I went out to ride the tractor for a while. I noticed bloody show and called the midwife to let her know it might be the day. I was expecting a very fast labor. Well, it went on for 2 days and 3 nights. Not really heavy, but just enough that I couldn't sleep. The midwife came and went several times. I had never had any internal exams during a labor before, except for this time. Dialation was slow and grinding. We made a late night trip to the chiropracter for an adjustment and it helped me feel more "balanced."

At one point I went for a walk outside with my husband. I was in tears as we tried to decide whether we should transport or not. I knew I would end up with a c-sect, if I did. A lot of praying went on and the tide started to turn. Finally, I was fully dialated, but a cervical lip ( I had this to progressing degrees with each child) was holding me back. For over an hour the midwife held the lip back while I tried to push past it. Meconium in the water made us suspect something was wrong. Midwife said to take the pushing easy as she would have to suction. We really prayed. Baby was born with a whoosh - Zane. He was perfect and our most beautiful baby yet - It was June 2, 1996. Had trouble with the placenta - very strange. Turns ou t that there were 2 placentas. I had conceived twins but one had "vanished." So many funny feelings during this pregnancy all seemed to make sense, including the "concentrated" morning sickess and the strange cramps at 4 months.

I practically memorized "Spiritual Midwifery" by Ina May Gaskin and I recommend it heartily. All 3 births were attended by a lay midwife with lots of faith and humility but no backup ( the only choice in our area.) This third birth really made me realize that birth really is a life and death passage and not to be blase' about it. A woman attendant adds a lot to the birth process. Follow your heart!

~Polly ~
Wife to Brad, Mom to Caleb, Lydia and Zane