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Sarah's Birth

All my life my mother used to tell me how important it was to go for your annual Ob / Gyn appointments. I suppose at 15 it might have seemed young, but they discovered on my very first pap that I had moderate displaysia (a pre cancerous cell growth in the cervix). My mother and I were worried because my family is highly prone to cancer on all sides and my Aunt died from cervical cancer only months before. After ackward and painful biopsies. I had an in-office LEEP procedure to remove it. My next pap 3 months later showed my Doctor had removed it all.

Six months later I was diagnosed again. Same routine. I was able to hold off for approx. 8 months before my cramps became so severe that I had to stay home from school. I told my doctor and he ordered an ultrasound, the culprit was a large cyst on my right ovary. So at roughly 17 I had to be admitted into the hospital for a Laporoscopy. The surgery went well.

Again, at my next 6 month visit I had severe displaysia. This time a LEEP wasn't going to be enough. So I had to me admitted into the hospital again. This surgery he explained was much for intrusive and would remove much of my cervix. In lamens terms this meant that getting pregnant and carrying a baby to full term would be difficult. At this point I was so frustrated, "Why was this happening to me?" I cried. The next year I had two perfect paps, I was out of the woods.

At 21 my boyfriend (now my husband), were relaxing together and I started to get severe cramping in my abdominal/groin area. I couldn't pin point it. I was worried and so was he, after a few hours I could hardly walk. The next day I felt a little better, the stabbing pain was gone and I went to work. I didn't make it but an hour before I pleaded to be sent home. My father-in-law picked me up and I went straight to my Ob/Gyn, I wasn't sure if he could tell me what was wrong but he was the only doctor that I trusted. He fitted me in immediatly and after explaining the symptoms through the sobs of pain, he did an ultrasound and gasped! My heart stopped. There on the screen was massive cyst (the size of a grapefruit). He was just as suprised as I was because only six weeks before he had seen the cyst, it was very small, and very likely to disolve on its own. He asked me to get dressed and step into his office. He explained that he would have to remove the cyst immediatley and more than likely the ovary. "How could this be," I cried " I'm to young!". The following week I came out of surgery only half the reproductive self I was. This haunted me. I was terrified to go back for check ups, although I did make myself.

After my husband and I were together 5 years, (married six months) our families began to ask when we were going to try and have children. My heart wretched at the thought of all the dissapointments that might lay ahead. We agreed privately that we would not TRY per se, but let it happen naturaly. By the mightly hand of God, two weeks later I discovered I was already pregant. I cried like I'd never cried before. All of the anguish and fear was wiped away and I knew I would be okay. Not only did I carry my daughter Sarah to full term, but I had the most amazing labor and delivery. 1.5 hours of (felt) labor and 3 hours after my epidural. She is now proof that God works in mystrious ways. She IS a miracle.

I love you Sarah!

Mom