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Week by Week

Alex

Here's the story of my baby's birth. I still get upset about a lot of what transpired and am looking forward to having a second child so that I can make the delivery experience memorable in a good way. But do not get me wrong, the end result was still a beautiful, healthy boy named Alex that I wouldn't trade for anything. I just wish he could have come about in a more loving manner. Next time I will know more what to expect and will demand my rights.

I arrived at the hospital on Friday, June 20 at 4am. I was able to go 'til about 2pm before I requested some pain relief. Since the anesthesiologist was busy, they said they could give me Stadol to tide me over. It actually worked very well for some time. But by 3:30 the anesthesiologist came in. I didn't know how much longer I had to go with the pain, so I had her give me the epidural. They did not check how far along the baby was at that time. The first mistake was the anesthesiologist gave me too much epidural and it caused me too go completely numb. I was very scared because the nurses were moving my legs around and I could see them flopping - but I felt nothing. My doctor gave me a pelvic and determined that the baby was ready to be delivered. It was about 5pm. I told him I couldn't feel anything and he looked very upset at the nurses for not telling him earlier. He told them to immediately remove the epidural drip. Meanwhile the baby's heart rate was starting to fluctuate. My husband and I were watching the monitor constantly. By 7pm my body was still completely numb, but the baby's heartrate had dropped from 140 to 50! I noticed it and told my husband. He ran to get the nurses. They had not been monitoring the baby's heart rate. Since his heart rate was dangerously fluctuating, the doctor didn't have me push for more than a few minutes before he determined that the vacuum extractor was required. I still remember the nurses taking turns pushing very hard on my abdomen to get the baby out.. The doctor gave me an episiotomy too. By 7:20pm the Alex was born. He had a lot of pain and had an unusually huge black bruise on his head.

When my baby was delivered, I wanted to hold him and nurse him for a while. They let me hold him for a minute or so and then took him to be weighed, etc. Then they brought him back for about 10 minutes to breastfeed. I wanted to feed and hold him longer but the nurse was at my side grabbing for him to take him to the nursery for regular "newborn checks", like bathing, etc. I find out later that they just left him in a bassinet in the nursery and he cried for hours (my family were able to view him from the outside nursery window and my dad actually filmed my baby howling for his momma, all alone in the bassinet). Meanwhile, I was in the recovery room, wishing I had my baby!

From the time I got to the hospital, I was telling the nurses I wanted to breastfeed exclusively. They had made notes in their files and everything. But yet they fed him formula anyway. I was in the recovery room asking for my baby right away. The nurse said they would bring the baby to feed later. I asked if he could sleep with me, they said no - that was not hospital policy. So after a few hours and my baby hadn't been brought to me, I called. They said they gave him formula!! I was very upset. I asked if they could still bring him to me for his next feeding at least. They said they would at 2am. I didn't believe them, so I stayed awake all night. They didn't bring him, so I called at 2:30 and asked for him. They finally brought him at around 4am. I was helpless - trapped to an IV tube that was connected to an empty sack. Supposedly they don't have the baby sleep with the mother so that the mother can rest and recover. Well, I certainly didn't rest. If they would have let me "room-in" with the baby, I could have at least got some sleep.

By 7pm on Saturday, they wanted to release me (24 hours from delivery). However, they said my baby hadn't urinated yet, so I would have to leave without him!!! I asked if I could wait around 'til he urinated. They insisted that they give him water or formula so that he could urinate. Has anyone heard of this policy of requiring a wet diaper within 24 hours of delivery? I relented, thinking I could at least get him home with me and then never allow water or formula again. Well, he still didn't urinate that evening so they made me go home. I told them to call me, no matter what, as soon as he urinated. So, at 430am they did call me. I immediately went and got him. They said if he didn't have another wet diaper to bring him back. I probably didn't produce enough milk right away BECAUSE of this pressure they gave me. They had also sent me home with cases of formula. By around 8pm he had not urinated, so we brought him in. They said they would have to keep him in intensive care for two days to observe him and make sure he was well hydrated. By the next morning my milk had come in with plenty of milk, but they insisted on keeping him "per hospital policy". So, I went to that hospital every three hours for two days until they LET me take my baby home. When I got the bill it said "MILD dehydration" was the diagnosis. I should have been able to take him home right away when my milk came in. Rooming-in from the start would have solved this problem.

Thanks for listening to my story. Although I was upset about a few of the mistakes they made early on, the main thing that really mattered to me was being with my baby. That is so important. My baby is now almost five months, breastfeeding exclusively. However, it was a tough road those first few days because of me constantly battling with the nurses to allow me to breastfeed my baby. Even when he was in the intensive care (unnecessarily as it turned out), and I was quite insistent on breastfeeding, they threatened me that if I wasn't there every 3 hours around the clock, they would feed him formula. It might have helped if they allowed me to stay there with him.

Sorry for all my griping, but it really helps to get it all out. If anyone had similar frustrations with "hospital policies", please email me at jonica@juno.com or just if you want to comment. Monica