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Week by Week

Galen

Galen was an unplanned but not unwanted birth. We were (are) both young and wanted to wait till we were about 25-26 to start a family...apparently the Gods had other plans for us.

In January of '96 Galen was conceived, unbeknownst to us. We both had a growing suspicion that I was pregnant that neither shared with the other. I still have no idea really why we thought this as I really had no pregnancy symptoms at first and since I had never kept track of my period I didn't even realize I was late.

After about a month of secret thoughts the possibility was brought to the surface in a very sweet way. As we were passing each other in a doorway we both had to turn sideways in order for the both of us to get through (VERY small doorway). Smiling at me Jeff gently put his hand on my belly and rubbed it. Confused I asked him why he was doing that...he just smiled at me some more and said, "cause there could be a baby in there." It was at that moment that I could deny it no longer.

A few weeks later I did a home pregnancy test and the positive result surprised neither of us. Not long after that I saw a group of midwives who confirmed the pregnancy and gave me my first prenatal checkup. It was pretty uneventful except when we heard the heartbeat. I was only 9-1/2 weeks along, which is pretty early for hearing the heartbeat.

The next 4 months were pretty normal. I switched to my old family doctor because he is a great man. We had an ultra-sound done at about 17 weeks which we brought my mom to. Since we were moving 4 hours away we had the tech tell her the sex but were adamant that we did not want to know...we thought we wanted to be surprised but as soon as my mom got home later that night we had her tell us. We were having a boy.

We had one minor miscarriage scare (if a miscarriage scare can ever be called minor) when I found that I was spotting. I guess you really couldn't even consider it spotting since all I saw was one spot of blood on the toilet paper after I used the bathroom and that was it. Not another single sign of a possible miscarriage...but I was scared, as was Jeff. After a call to the doctors (where they were not in the least bit helpful) and a day of barely moving things calmed down. >dd>That is until my 32-week checkup and the wonderful GD (gestational diabetes) test that all pregnant women love (NOT!). Sitting in the doctors office for 3 hours is not fun, not to mention I started feeling sick towards the end of the test. It seems my luck was not with me that day as my test results were slightly above normal and the doctor decided that just to be safe they needed to treat me as if I had GD...which of course brought in all the fun of testing my blood three times a day and eating on a schedule.

I also got to visit with a high-risk OBGYN at a clinic two hours away from us. Once every other week...Mistake #1: Very pregnant woman + Long car ride = You don't want to know. The one plus to it was on the first visit we were given another ultra-sound to check the size of the baby, boy had he grown since we had seen him last.

Our hopes were also lifted that we would not have to be induced for I was, at barely 33 weeks, already 1 centimeter dilated...Mistake #2: Dilation can tell you nothing about how soon you are going to deliver, as is apparent with me; by 35 weeks I was 2 centimeters, 38 weeks 3 centimeters...

,,,And at 40 weeks 3 days they induced me. After a long weekend visiting with my mom and Grandpa (they had made a special trip out to see us and were hoping to see Galen before they had to leave), tons of braxton hicks contractions (which were obviously worth something), and dealing with a baby who's favorite pastime seemed to be pounding on my cervix (or was I feeling dilation?) I was ready to go...Mistake #3: Allow them to induce me.

So early Monday morning we arrived at the hospital, as prepared as we could possibly have been. After the usual admittance procedures (filing out forms, changing into a gown, being shown our room, etc) we entered the L&D room...it was a little scary; the high-tech equipment, the horrible hospital smell, the thought that soon we would be holding our child in our arms.

Our nurse was wonderful. We talked a lot with her as the day wore on and family and friends came and went. It was a pleasant day, though at times a little boring. Of course we didn't have our baby that day. By 6:00pm the doctor turned off the IV of pitocin and told me to go back to my room and rest. I was reluctant, I wanted to have my baby so badly and I knew that by early afternoon on Tuesday my mom and Grandpa would have to leave, possibly without seeing Galen.

I also knew that if the doctor would've just broke my bag of waters I would've had the baby by then. But he was reluctant. He said he didn't want to commit that much to delivering the baby, he wasn't ready to say to me that I had 24 hours or they would be doing a c-section. And so we all moved into my room...as we did a thunderstorm rolled in, it seemed almost surreal. Thunderstorms in the middle of October in Minnesota are rare if not unheard of...we still to this day wonder if it was some kind of announcement from the Gods that Galen would soon be here.

I didn't sleep well at first. Amazingly enough it was not because of the excitement or because I was anxious. Instead it happened to be my back which was hurting something terrible. I think it was 12:30am when a nurse came in to check on us and found me awake watching Nick at Nite. After finding out what was wrong she got me a little Nubain so I could sleep. I never even thought about the fact I was taking a drug, that would more then likely affect my baby, I was just too tired...Mistake #4.

We had a different nurse in the morning, one I didn't really like at first. She was too straightforward for me...she told us exactly what to expect from her which sounded reasonable enough but I was worried that somehow it would interfere with our desire for a natural childbirth (well, as natural as it gets being induced and all). I realized later though that if I got stuck, where I didn't want to go on, she would be just what I would need.

I showered, changed gowns, grabbed all the things we thought we would need (radio, tapes, etc) and we settled into the L&D room once more. This time my doctor came in and broke my waters right away, it was quite an interesting feeling. Then they hooked up the IV and off I went, it was 9am.

For awhile the contractions were strong but I was able to handle them pretty well. My mom, Jeff's mom, my grandpa, and a few other were in the room with us. I was sitting in the gliding rocking chair just watching my contractions (I remember that they were coming every 2-3 minutes and lasting up to 90 seconds, my nurse wanted to turn down the IV but the head nurse didn't think I would be able to maintain labor if she did) on the monitor (which they had me hooked up to the whole time, made it hard for trips to the bathroom). After awhile me and Jeff became kind of quiet and everyone else moved to the other side of the room and talked amongst themselves.

At some point, I don't remember when exactly but I think it was after 10:30am, the contractions started to get really hard. My nurse asked me if I wanted to have everyone leave and I told her yes...then I begged for drugs...Mistake #5: If I would've just wanted long enough to get use to the contractions I would have been fine. I was 5 centimeters dilated.

They gave me a little more Nubain and I laid in bed drifting in and out of sleep. Apparently the nurses had never seen anyone react the way I was, I kept hearing them whispering about how well I was handling things...even after the Nubain wore off. I guess lucky Jeff got to read that book he brought with after all (actually I had told him to keep it in my room because he wouldn't be needing it, he had to go back to get it). My main problem was the blood pressure cuff that kept going off every half an hour and the woman who kept coming back to take some blood.

There were a few complications during labor that I was mainly unaware of.

They started losing Galen's heartbeat at some point and after having me try all kinds of different positions (which I hated just as much as the Jello they forced down my throat because my blood sugar levels were low) they decided they needed to put on an internal monitor. Dear sweet Jeff remembered we did not want one used but when they asked him why he couldn't remember without me conscious enough to help him out.

Luckily Galen had another idea altogether and after trying to put the probe on his head 4 times with no success they gave up. It took a few more minutes of being uncomfortable while they found his heartbeat again with the external monitor.

The second complication almost necessitated a c-section. You see Galen did not drop...not till I was about 8 centimeters anyway.

2:15pm (or so) I ask for a little more Nubain and my nurse checks me first, I am 6 centimeters and can have more Nubain.

At this point my mom and grandpa are getting ready to leave. They have the nurse ask me if it is ok if they come in to say bye... I feel bad about it but I say no because I know it will distract me to much.

2:25pm (or so) the head nurse comes in and wants to check me herself. I'm 8 centimeters, it's too late for more drugs. I argue for a bit and then fall back asleep. I have found out how to best handle my contractions; when they come on I breath normally and count down from 30 slowly. I know that when I hit 25 the contractions are the hardest, by 15-10 they are subsiding, and all I have to do is make it to 1 and they are gone. This works very well for the contractions I have when I am awake...when I am asleep I don't even notice them.

My mom and grandpa decide to stay a little longer, after all I am really close at this point. The nurse has called the doctor and they are starting to prepare the room, I am obliviously to it all.

3:00pm The doctor tells me I can push whenever I feel like it. I don't want to. I am mad, the bed was raised and my concentration has been messed up. I can no longer stay on top of the contractions and when I push for the first time it HURTS!

For a half an hour I reluctantly pushed. And I screamed and cried and complained about the pain. Labor had been nothing, I could handle labor but pushing was horrible. It felt like a couple of bowling balls were trying to tear their way through my rectum, and I made sure everyone knew this. My doctor tried stretching me so that I wouldn't need an episiotomy (my request)...I think I startled him when I screeched at him to "just cut me damn it".

I begged for a c-section. Said I wasn't going to do it. Told Jeff "no more kids"...I am slightly ashamed that I acted so horribly.

3:30pm I felt something slip from my body and suddenly the pain is gone. I look down to see the doctor quickly cutting the cord of a slightly blue, limp baby boy, my baby boy. He rushes him to the warming table (Galen was certain he made it clear he was not happy about the disruption of his serene life, he had his first poop as the doctor was holding him and the doctor nearly slipped). It seems my son was not breathing.

I don't think I realized it at first, I was too caught up in my bliss and I was also too out of it after the delivery. Jeff was at my side asking if he could go over by Galen and in a daze I told him to go ahead. Those first memories of my son and my husband together I will never forget; Galen was breathing by then and crying quite loudly...and Jeff, Jeff was gently caressing and quietly talking to him as the nurses cleaned him up. Jeff was also the first person (other then the doctor) to hold Galen.

At some point they gave me some kind of drug. The placenta didn't want to come out and they were concerned about it. I think it finally came out on its own at about 4:00pm.

Despite all the pain and everything else it was a wonderful experience. Galen literally stopped my heart for a few moments...it was (and is) beautiful. My mom and grandpa both got to see and hold Galen (though not till after I got back into my room; Jeff made sure that no one held him before I did).

The day was October 15th, four days after my birthday, What a present!

On a sad note, despite much desire on both mine and Jeff's part for me to nurse Galen we were only able to get him to latch on twice...in 3 months time. I believe that part of the problem was because I had flat nipples, part of it was from the drugs during and after delivery, a lot of it was nipple confusion and a lot was lack of adequate support and information (though Jeff and our local LLL leader did a wonderful job of trying to provide me with both.

Galen was originally a planned homebirth but we ended up in the hospital for various reasons. I am hoping next time we will not only have a successful homebirth but a successful nursing relationship...hopefully in the next year!